i want be 100% in everywhere i step, everyday!

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I was wrong about...

Update kali ini edisi curhat. Biasanya sejak sudah bersuami, jarang sekali aku curhat disini karena rasanya sudah cukup mengutarakan isi hati. Perempuan kan gitu ya "yang penting udah dikeluarin unek-uneknya". Alhasil jadi malas untuk nulis yang isinya curhatan. Padahal sebenernya kalau niat sih bisa-bisa aja. cuma seringnya memang gak ada waktu juga.  Bicara masalah waktu, segalanya jadi serba sat set sejak kehidupanku harus ditata kembali karena pindah domisili tanpa pengalaman sebelumnya, kerjaan baru, punya anak batita, suami kerja jauh (meski gak LDR), dan jauh dari keluarga. Binar yang saat itu baru 1,5 tahun akhirnya harus diasuh oleh pengasuh. Patah hati terbesar sepanjang hidup. Saat itu overthinking segala-galanya. Apalagi karena rumah pengasuh dekat, Binar sering diajak keluar rumah bahkan ke rumah pengasuh. Saat itu kupikir "Okelah yang penting urusan pengasuhan aman", kami bisa fokus bekerja toh rumah pengasuh dekat dan semuanya ku kenal meskipun memang...
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So, guys

H ow have you been? Can't believe three years had passed since the last time I've posted something here. Longing a lot to write something and telling my life updates these days ( sok penting ). Suddenly I miss my old self, who so easy journaling everything just to release every feeling in life. So yesterday, I started to look after my blog, logged into ( with the moment of forgetting password and email used). I scrolled down, down, down, even I read my very first post in 2009, when I was in high school, of course with my silly and teenager typical writing. I almost deleted my old posts because feeling ashamed with 'not so important post' I wrote though I also love some posts. So I realised that I've grown up with this blog. Why not just continue journaling? The old posts are parts of my life too. Hihi. And here I am, trying to write again, journaling, and filling this blog again. 
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A Letter to My Daughter

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Dear Binar, Sometimes I look at you and realize how much of our story begins with you. From the moment you came into our lives, you changed everything. You made Ibu and ayah parents, and through you, we began this journey of learning how to love, nurture, and guide. Thank you for being our teacher in ways you may never realize—your first smile, your cries, your milestones, and even your challenges have shaped us into the parents we are becoming. I want to apologize, my love. We are not perfect, and we know we have stumbled along the way. We are still learning, and sometimes our best may not feel like enough. Especially now, with the arrival of your younger sibling, our attention is often divided, and I know you may sometimes feel like you have to share pieces of us. Please know that this does not mean you are loved any less. In fact, our love for you only grows deeper as we see you stepping into the role of an older sibling with patience and kindness. You are our first, our precious be...
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